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This is a one shot inspired by and written in the style of the song "Tie Me Kangaroo Down Sport". The story of the song is that an elderly Alan is about to die and he is explaining that he's giving the deed to the house he and Carmen lived in to whoever in the room wants it. He also goes over what is needed to be done for the house's upkeep (including tying down the tree in the backyard because it's susceptible to wind damage) for when he's gone, and he reserves his last words for his loving wife.


He's an old kind hearted balloon, dying, in his bed.

He gets his head up and turns to his wife and friends

and says:

Take this old house's deed

Take this old house's deed

It's something we no longer need

So take this old house's deed


All together now

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down


Clean out the old swimming pool

Clean out the old swimming pool

You need a place to keep cool

So clean out the old swimming pool


All together now

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down


Take my borrowed stuff back

Take my borrowed stuff back

It's time that got onto its track

Take my borrowed stuff back


All together now

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down


Mind the housekeeping chores, guys

Mind the housekeeping chores

Careful, don't get any sores

Mind the housekeeping chores


All together now

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down


Play that relaxing music

Play that relaxing music

Uh, like, keep playing 'till I'm through with it

Play that relaxing music


All together now

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down


Carmen how I love you so

Carmen how I love you so

...

He told me how he loved me so, oh

Just before it was time for him to go


All together now

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down

Tie the backyard tree down, sport

Tie the backyard tree down

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